Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Ample Blossoms, a Bra Guide for Full Figures


Calling all voluptuous vixens, flourishing somewhere subsequent to position 4 of the English alphabet. You stand no chance of being transposed with the wall or the flower pressed up against it. No, your extravagantly garnished torso is an unmistakably glitzy hallmark.

You require no additional ornamentation, because you come equipped with the ultimate ornaments. Your fill your blouses and dresses with excitement and glamour. Echoing the silver screen silhouettes of Sophia Loren and Marilyn Monroe, or modern sirens like Salma Hayek.

And because of it, gravity can not keep its greedy hands off of your anatomical dowry. Your back must battle ferociously to keep your soldiers somewhere in the vicinity of your bustline, and at some point in your life, you've probably been temporarily scarred by the indent of a bra strap.

Cower no more, there are weapons of refuge. Below is a breakdown of some of the key points in your arsenal.

But first, lets discuss your Commander's Intent. If you and your bra accomplish nothing else , you must accomplish this. Your breasts should rest like little soldiers half way between your shoulder and elbow. They must not be allowed to do reconnaissance inside your armpits or scout along your navel. They should be positioned straight forward, at attention.

This mission is not without its costs. But this is undeniably the most important item in your wardrobe, and considering cost per wear, it is definitely worth the investment. One bra is not going to be appropriate for every offense, but a series of wise investments can also attack 10 lbs, 10 years, and at least 10 gaps between blouse buttons. Venus below is your bra armory.



If you trot into Victoria Secret, you will be offered some type of demi push up bra; that is the secret behind Victoria. Padding has its place, but they are not the appropriate supplier for you. What you need is full coverage. One option is the lined, formed cup. These babies hold their shape even when not loaded. And they are going to give you the smoothest look under t-shirts or other fitted garments. I highly recommend Le Mystere for shape and durability. It comes in a plethora of sizes and the Raspberry color is currently on sale for $29.99.



For maximum support, you actually need a seamed bra. Bra seams are a point of strength so don't let this lacy little Freya bra fool you. With three seams, it is a dynamo power house of comfort and support. And some ladies aren't properly cupped by a pre-molded bra. Seamed bras are the mothers and grandmothers of molded bras, and they come with a wealth of wisdom and experience. Get this one for $49.99.




Now, there are times for button up blouses which means there are times for minimizers. The cups of a minimizer bra are designed to reduce the projection of the breasts. Instead of points, the breast is held in a firm mound. The cup shape is designed with a wider diameter and a shorter projection. Your malleable breast tissue is flattened and moved toward your arms, center cleavage, up your chest and down towards your waist. In general, a minimizer bra will reduce your breast circumference as follows: B cup reduces 1/2", C cup reduces 3/4", D cup reduces 1", DD cup and larger reduces 1-1/4" or possibly more. But don't think that you can buy a smaller size for more minimizing effect. All you will get is an ill-fitting bra.

The other important aspect of this option is the lack of underwire. Contrary to popular belief the underwire is not an essential element for bra support. For some, especially for those with curious wanderers, the underwire pokes into the sides of the tissue. This eliminates the problem without compromising support.

Now, for your outer offense, in front of your breasted bastion. Your optimum option is actually fitted, demi shirts. Now don't misunderstand. I am not recommending over exposure. In fact all the bras I've recommended won't permit it. What I'm recommending is a modest scoop neck, v neck, or square neck. Anything that exposes your lovely clavicles. A high chunky neck can quickly turn into a second chin. And covering up a large bust creates the "Mommy Jean" effect: a formidable, uninterrupted line of flesh. Instead, break into up into visually consumable pieces.

Now go, I've given you several affordable options, shop and protect. Arm your army of two.

14 comments:

  1. Ok. I needed this info more than I'd even like to admit. I like the idea of blossoms. Boulders aren't exactly fem.

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  2. this is my first time commenting. I really enjoy your blog. This entry is so helpful and fun. Thanks for the tips!

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  3. This is the post I've been waiting for. I wear 34-36 DDD!!! I'd never heard of wearing the seamed cups and I think that might be a good option for me. If only I can find one in my crazy size!

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  4. Oh thank you, thank you, I needed to hear this. Probably more than once. I love, love, love the soldier metaphor too.

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  5. Forever more I will look into the mirror and see peonies (my fave bloom)!

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  6. Do you have suggestions for sports bras for DD? Also, with the second seamed option, how do you cover up so you don't look like you are smuggling tictacs? :)

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  7. d.c.r.k.
    I would recommend taking a look at the Goddess Sport Bra 5056: http://budurl.com/goddess

    Regarding keeping your your sensitive ends secret in the seamed option, try a concealer like this one: http://budurl.com/lowbeam

    Or opt for the molded bra which is specifically designed to keep everything smooth.

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  8. Oh d.c.r.k.
    Fig Leaves is having a sale on sporty bras. All these ones come in a DD: http://budurl.com/sportysale

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  9. A wonderful, wonderful online shop for those (much) bigger blooms: bravissimo.com

    They even have clothing specifically tailored for those of us who are a size 8 at the waist and a 16 up top.

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  10. You did not recomend a place to purchase minimizer bra or a specific one, Can you? I hate the underwire but require a bigger cup size.

    Thanks

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  11. I love you...is that wrong? I hate HATE bra shopping!

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  12. Thank you! I am always looking for a good bra as I'm in the triple category. Thanks for this great information!

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  13. Dear Rachael,
    I read this post and laughed out loud when you said they should stand as little soldiers halfway between your shoulders and elbow. A little because that was such a cute way to say it, but also because I thought that was ridiculous! "She hasn't seen my chest," I thought to myself. "No way is that possible!" Well, I went bra shopping last week keeping that little tidbit in mind. Silly little tidbit. Well, I was having a little trouble at the shop so I decided to ask for a fitting. Wouldn't you know that I was 1 band size off and 3- yes, 3 cup sizes off! I thought I was DD but they said G. They didn't carry anything like that. So I tried another place and they came out with the same measurement! I had to order online with a 32G, and guess what? Guess what?! They stand like little... well, not so much little.... soldiers right between my shoulders and my elbows! HOLY CRAP I never thought that would happen! Reading this gave me all sorts of help finding the right bra and I am so grateful because I am so much more comfortable now! I had no idea what a huge difference that would make! Thank you so much. I don't know how you know everything on every shape, but you totally do.
    Keep up the good work!
    Also I, too, will be adopting little children and it seems so much more rare than people adopting babies. I feel a little kindred spirit with you and will follow your story as I do your website.
    Love,
    Jenn

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