For anyone whose ever had a pile of negatively charged discards on their bedroom floor, the sparkly eyed, shiny smiled, gorgeously real Busy Bee Lauren.
As someone who struggles with depression and self image issues, it can be hard to focus on what is beautiful about myself. I have spent so much time devoted to telling myself I was ugly, and hideous and not of worth, it's almost a natural instinct to say, "nothing is beautiful." But I know that is not true.
For years and years I would try on at least 3 outfits every day before school. I would say, "ugh! I look so fat!" or "people will think i am so ugly in this!" and finally, I would settle on something because if I didn't I would be late for school. I remember one day as I was gazing in the mirror, deciding what level of ugly I was that day, I noticed how beautiful my hair was. I noticed that it was thick, and shiny and had beautiful waves. I noticed that it framed my face perfectly. And while I might not be happy with my overall appearance, I was genuinely happy with my hair. That day I made progress.
Every day since then I have looked in the mirror, and maybe I haven't loved everything I have seen, but at least I have loved my hair. It has been an accessory I can wear every day that helps me feel confident, and beautiful and puts a pep in my step! And as silly as this may sound, every day I am grateful for that day that I realized that I had pretty hair...because that day I realized, there was something about me that was beautiful. Something that made me feel of worth.
And ever since then I have known, it's not just my hair that is of worth. It's me.
Dear Lauren,
ReplyDeleteYour hair IS gorgeous, you lucky thing! And you are adorable. Seriously adorable. I know we're all our own worst critics (I am most definitely mine), but I, a complete stranger, just thought you should know that you are neither "fat" nor "ugly." xo
Lauren is a very very beautiful person!!! It may sound cliche but inside and out. She is statuesque and has a killer sense of style. One of the few people that can pull of a red pout without looking like she is trying too hard.
ReplyDeleteThe most beautiful things about her is that she is real. It was a pleasure to be acquainted.
i've always said you've had awesome hair. and a tiny little waist, too - perfect for that rest dress.
ReplyDeleteHmmm - I've felt the same way about my hair for like 60 years.
ReplyDeletei use the "nobody will want to rent an apt to us becasue they'll be like "ohh she is way too ugly!" or "they wont want to serve us as the restaurant because they'll be like "ugg she is far too fat to eat here!"..sad thing is sometimes i seriously think people think that about me! it drives bret INSANE
ReplyDeleteyes, your hair is amazing! and so are you.
ReplyDelete(i'm still trying to battle the trying-3-outfits-on-every-day problem. it's getting better.)
I have a crush on her hair. And I don't know why I said it like that, but I'm pretty sure it's almost a full-blown love affair.
ReplyDeleteGORGEOUS!
ReplyDelete